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About Literature / Artist Member Alex Monkman21/Male/Canada Recent Activity
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(Contains: sexual themes and strong language)
False love. It is a complex feeling. To me, it means feeling for someone who isn’t what they are. That was something that I wanted to end tonight. I walked the streets of a desolate town. I was in the middle of the road, which was unoccupied for the night. So few people liked being out at night. This was a terrible neighbourhood, but it was home to the one I thought I knew.
By the time I was actually on a sidewalk, a woman in a very revealing dress said cheerfully, “Hey, handsome. You look wealthy. Wanna see the best time fifty bucks can buy?”
I spat, “Bugger off”, and started walking faster. I only looked rich by comparison to everyone in this neighbourhood just because I wore a suit with tie, all grey. I had but one business, and wanted no pleasure from a whore. That would have solved nothing, from what I was feeling on this night.
I made my way to an apartment building. I recognized this place from something it once was, and became a part of criminals’ territory. I barged in to the landlord’s office—at least it looked like one—and stated, “Apartment 13.”
Without getting up from his dusty armchair with its back to me, the man replied, “Take the first stair case from the entrance. Can’t miss it.”
I would’ve wagered that he was in his birthday suit. I did see his arms being bare, and they were pretty flabby. Given this neighbourhood, fat people would’ve gone naked. That just disappointed me, knowing that fat people couldn’t afford clothes in this hellhole.
The thought was instantly dismissed as I went up the short flight of stairs, and went right, finding the first apartment labelled “10”. I was right about the order. I passed 11 and 12. The number 13 on the apartment’s door before which I stood, was merely painted on, but was slowly peeling off. I knocked six times in a rhythm I liked, and waited.

The door opened, and the one to answer, was a woman, significantly younger than me. She had blonde hair that reached her shoulders, and blue eyes. Just what every man liked. I would’ve guessed that she was a prostitute, for she wore a black dress that revealed much of her cleavage, and the skirt was short, along with fishnet stockings. She definitely wore no mascara, since she was staying in tonight. Now this was the perfect night to get what I wanted. I said, “Guten Abend, meine Liebe. May I come in?”
“Who are you?” she asked. “How did you know I speak German?”
“Just let me in.” I was already impatient. “We need to talk.”
The woman reluctantly stood aside, so I could enter. It was a wonder she got by. Her so-called apartment was only the bathroom and a bedroom. She had only a normal bed, with a standard frame. There was a small table for a nightstand and a small table for a television set in front of the bed. They were all very dirty. The window was open, and there was nothing to cover it.
I turned around to face the woman. I spoke, “Ava, right?”
She hesitated, before saying, “Y-yes… I’m… Ava…” She was awkward. Whether it really was her name, was hard to prove.
I sighed before speaking, “I don’t know if you know me, but I’m Connor Hanson. If that doesn’t ring a bell to you, I remember things you told me on twitter. You told me of a boy you dated in the ninth grade for a semester and a summer before his untimely demise from a terrible road accident. You attended a school in a nice part of the city where you lived, but here you are letting men have their way with you for money in such a rundown town.”
“How did”-
“The way you dress, of course. I told you all about me, too. My tastes in entertainment, my family, where I live, how I view the world, and what inspires my art. You were the first to understand me, and you made feel the way I never felt before.” I paused before taking a step closer to her. “You told me you loved me. Did you mean it?”
“How could I forget? Now I know you.”
I shouted, “Answer the question!”
“I… I don’t know…”
I took hold of the woman, and said, “Look into my eyes. Tell me about your relationship with Ricardo: how you met, what you did, and how he died.”
She started awkwardly, “I met him a few weeks into the school year. He was in the audience on the day of my first time wrestling.” She then went on in a normal tone, “I was shoved out of the ring, and landed right into someone’s arms. I looked up, and saw a pair of gorgeous eyes. I thanked him and later asked to hang out with him. We went to a few movies together, but always hung out at a park, where I taught him German. I felt so in love with him, and he told me he loved me on Valentine’s Day. On the weekend after that, just a day before my birthday, he was taking a stroll with his friends. The car they were in, was rammed into. The driver was drunk and had no idea what he was doing. All were dead on impact, except for Ricardo. His injuries were fatal. He let me know once more that he loved me, before he died on his hospital bed. I grieved for him for weeks on end, and tried many times to kill myself, hoping to”-
“Stop”, I interrupted, raising a hand. “I heard enough.” Listening to that sob-story was torturous. “I know acting, and you sound like you’re just reading the script.”
“Why are you even here?” the girl asked angrily.
Sounding like a robot, I said, “I want to know if I can trust you, Ava, if that is really your name. What I want to know is if anything you posted at all on twitter is true. You said you lived in a nice part of the city, which is a lie. You said you have black hair and green eyes, which is also a lie. You said you were a waitress, but your clothes say ‘prostitute’. You made everything up, just so you could get attention.” I eyed a wine bottle on the nightstand, where I approached. I picked up the bottle, which was half-empty, and it wasn’t dusty at all. I shook my head at the sight. I stated, “It seems you can only afford the cheap stuff, like cheap wine.” I slammed the bottle against the wall, and the glass that it was made of, shattered easily. I dropped the part that I held and reproached the girl. I looked into her eyes and said lowly, “You knew I cared about you. You once told me you loved me. Was that true?”
She thought long and hard, I could tell, until she answered, “No… I… I only said that, hoping to get closer to you.”
I backed away, speaking, “Well, you have what you wanted, but not what you envisioned.” I dug under my jacket and pulled out a silenced handgun. “There are quite a few motivations for killing. My motivation would be hate. I hate you for all the lies that you told.” I paused before changing my tone. “Ava Kriegler… or should I say Edna Harris?”
The girl was about to lunge toward me, but I reminded her who held the gun, saying, “Don’t even think about it.”
“What are you waiting for, then? Shoot.”
I retracted my arm as I neared her, and said, “I could, but my reason to want such a thing is not enough.” I lifted my arm, and smacked her head with the gun’s butt, which made her fall over. I continued, “When I read messages of possible lies, I had a change of heart. Still, you’re not worth it. Enjoy your days as a whore in a town that will be your tomb in a matter of years.” I eyed the gun. “I do want to take a shot. So, enjoy your new wound as well.” I deliberately aimed at her leg, and I pulled the trigger. There was a ping, followed by the girl groaning from the wound. I holstered the gun and stormed out of the apartment.
Even though I got to let the girl know how I felt, there were still things I needed to get rid of to avoid thinking about her. Like what I had just done, I had to get past my own issues alone.
False Love
You can ignore this if you like. I take pity on groups when their themes and contests fail. That's what this is for: a contest. It is about the causes and effects of love. I really don't want to go into detail on where I got this. It's also something I've been longing to write. So, hitting two targets with one bullet.
For the "Causes and Effects of Love" contest held by the group I-Promise-Exposure


Agent36496's Profile Picture
Alex Monkman
Artist | Literature
Current Residence: Ontario, Canada
deviantWEAR sizing preference: N/A
Favourite genre of music: Rock of any kind
Favourite photographer: Thelma Aterno (Ariel87), Mads Bjerre Henriksen, Petra Allerlei and Tereza Hola
Favourite style of art: Dark, fantasy, and emotional
Favourite cartoon character: Simba, Soren, Spyro, Cloud, Kiba, Kaiba Seto, Maka Albarn
Personal Quote: If you believe in yourself, you can accomplish almost anything.
I wanted to pass on a meme from ladypurpledreamer So, here goes.

Name: Alex

Age: 21

Type of Autism: Asperger's Syndrome

Talent (besides your art skills on DA): Stories and poems.

Likes in general: Reading and writing poetry and stories, mainly of the fantasy genre; puzzles; comic books; action movies; some comedy; playing video games; rock music; drinking tea while reading a good book

Dislikes in general: Repeating commercials; hype on an overrated game/show/franchise; dumb people; spam; really bad jokes; all foods that repulse me; when people criticize what I love

What keeps you calm: Silence when I want it, and music when I listen to it.

What annoys you: Brace yourself. You might wanna pour yourself come coffee for this. Spam; when a crowd just yaps; pretty much anything that annoys anyone in video games; the mention of "My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic"; fictions with the title "[country] x reader"; really lame jokes; people mocking characters I love; talk of Disney's "Frozen"; erotic drawings of furries; seeing close-ups men's [mutters] and women's [mutters]; sex jokes; any smell that repulses me; lags when I'm browsing and watching videos; comments from trolls; profane insults; music from mediocre pop singers; talk of mediocre pop singers.

Sensitive to: Mixed chatter from crowds; insults; anything emotional in media

Fetishes (be honest): None.

Addicted to: Some old things.

Weakness: I don't know how to tie a tie or shoelaces; I don't always understand jokes or puns

Strength: I'm a good speller; I'm creative; I have a good memory

Exact dream: Being a famous author.

Today was the birthday of the great Edgar Allan Poe. On 17 Jan, Simone Simons turned the big 30 ^^
  • Mood: Neutral
  • Watching: TV, what's it to ya

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Journal History



Add a Comment:
Torheit-die-Katze Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2015  Student Filmographer
Thanks a lot for the fav :la:
Agent36496 Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2015   Writer
Bugger off
Torheit-die-Katze Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2015  Student Filmographer
Whoah, that's rude. I'm sorry if I bothered you, but there are more polite ways to communicate that...
Agent36496 Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2015   Writer
Didn't you see the stamps in the favourites widget?
(1 Reply)
HellAboveHeaven Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
nice work! ;o;
Agent36496 Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2015   Writer
:? Could you be more specific?
Guardianowlbubo Featured By Owner Dec 31, 2014
happy new year.Party 
Guardianowlbubo Featured By Owner Dec 25, 2014
MERRY CHRISTMAS.Merry christmas everybody 
Agent36496 Featured By Owner Dec 25, 2014   Writer
Did you have a good one? ^^
Guardianowlbubo Featured By Owner Dec 25, 2014
Yes I did it was awesome:D (Big Grin) what did you get for Christmas?.
Agent36496 Featured By Owner Dec 25, 2014   Writer
Batman: Death of the Family book-and-mask set; Within Temptation: Hydra; Guardians of the Galaxy on Blu-ray; an amazing wolf carving; Assassin's Creed: Rogue; Tassimo mocha T-discs; chocolates; instant hot chocolate with marshmallows.
(1 Reply)
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